Lifestyle Fashion

Do pressure points really work in martial arts and on the street?

Well, it has been some time since I put pen to paper to write an article. But for those of you who remind me of my past articles, hello again and thanks for reading.

Do pressure points really work?

Consider this, the human body is vulnerable to attack in many ways, some require the application of a great force, others require a lighter force. The effects on the human body can be amplified by hitting or manipulating certain areas rather than others. The determining factor is: What kind of effect do you want to achieve?

But before going into a little more detail, I would like to point out this simple fact here and now. Using vital points requires some knowledge and a lot of practice, that being said, in this article I will cover a number of defensive tactics that can improve the correct application of just a few vital points, which will make your technique more powerful. and effective.

Now there are many names for these impact points, pressure points, weak areas, to name just a few. However, the names do not matter, if you hit the right place, it will harm your attacker. But, if you are a 7-stone woman, a punch to a normal point on the body will have little effect on an 18-stone man who attacks you. Rather, you must make maximum use of minimum force, so what are the best target areas to attack?

You see, there’s no point learning how to defend yourself if you’re going to blindly hit anything and end up hurting yourself in the process. So it makes sense to use the body’s weakest vulnerabilities to maximum effect when forced to defend yourself in any self-defense situation.

Okay, I hear you say, so how do I find the weak spots right? Try to press a point on your body and if it hurts you will know that if you hit that point on someone else’s body, you will hurt them. Put it this way, if that same 18 stone man attacked the 7 stone woman and she punched him in the eye with her finger, it will hurt just fine, that’s a simple use of a target area, but you need to know where there are these targets and the best shot to use on these targets as well.

The downside to all of this is that many of the good hit points are the size of a fifty cent piece, so they are not very large. Not only that, you must hit the target while it is moving, so your accuracy must be high. One way to help you learn where these goals are is to get a poster or something similar in a store or make your own and mark these points on this chart, pin it somewhere, and just reach out and touch each point until it becomes be familiar with its location on the body because, as stated above, if you are going to use pressure points, it must be accurate.

Now, there is no point in hitting someone on the chin if their jaw is as hard as your fist. But what about the eyes, hit in the vicinity of the eyes and it will have the desired effect. Also, the nose and throat are sensitive places to hit, even a little touch can cause massive pain. Another sensitive area is under the nose, where it meets the upper lip; In the lower part of the body, the places that you cannot attack are usually covered by muscles, like the chest, for example. The solar plexus, if you hit it with a closed fist or elbow, it can work effectively in this area, hit the V of the rib cage. The bladder area is also a weak point, especially if your attacker has had 8 pints of beer and it is full (be very careful, this is a dangerous area, especially if you kick it), even people with strong muscles of the stomach will bend.

Also, remember that all the major nerves and arteries are found inside the extremities. So the inside of the upper arm is more sensitive to a blow than the outside, the same goes for the inside of the thigh. If someone raises their arms and hits you in the armpit, it will cause extreme pain. The back of the knee is more sensitive than the outside. The kick to the shin again, the inside is more sensitive than the outside, a kick at this point will cause a lot of pain.

Hitting and shoving if you find yourself on the floor, which by the way, you should try to avoid at all costs with someone on top of you, push your thumb into the adams apple area and you will get a response that usually moves away or down you . Either way, giving it time to escape, don’t waste time trying to push under the jaw, it probably won’t work.

If you can afford it, buy a punching doll and mark all vulnerable areas. However, to find some sensitive areas that you are unsure about, try poking yourself with a pencil, not the pointed end, and see if it hurts because doing so will hurt someone else, this will tell you the best areas. On the back of the body there are a few points to consider when striking. The base of the skull where it joins the neck, the two kidneys two inches up and two inches out from the belt line, this is another sensitive area. The back of the legs, the back of the thigh, and the tendon behind the ankle are very sensitive if you kick hard enough that the attacker cannot walk.

In conclusion, if you want these tender points to work, you need to practice and remember where they are, you will also need to be accurate to be effective. A principle is to hit high and then low, it is a good method to adopt hitting the eyeballs and bottom balls together, as a man cannot defend both at the same time.

I have only covered a few vulnerabilities in this short article, there are many more, so place your chart at points where it hurts, use your thumbs, elbows, single-knuckle fist, and knees on these points and you can. incapacitate someone with little effort. The most important thing is to practice, practice and practice to make sure you know where these points are.

The real secret to success is enthusiasm.

Disclaimer: The author, publishers and distributors of this article disclaim any responsibility for any danger or injury of any kind to a reader or user of such information contained in this publication. This is sold for academic and educational studies only. Use of this information is at your own risk.

Lifestyle Fashion

Mindfulness and Squash (and all competitive sports)

What is mindfulness?

Mindfulness has become a buzzword lately, but don’t let that put you off seeing what all the fuss is about. We are big supporters of the idea, this is what the Oxford Dictionary has to say about it:

Mindfulness – A state of mind that is achieved by focusing one’s consciousness in the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.

Okay, does that sound like meditation? More or less, but not quite. While meditation aims to empty your mind of all thoughts for a period of time in order to feel completely relaxed, mindfulness is more about allowing your mind to do whatever it wants while really concentrating on your current physiological state, be it. whatever at the time. . Although it is undoubtedly relaxing, it also increases your concentration and self-awareness. Ideally, you should take the time to practice mindfulness every day – even just 10 short minutes can go a long way.

What does mindfulness have to do with Squash?

Used in the right way at the right times, mindfulness practice can bring great benefits to all of your performance levels and mental state, which can certainly be applied to your game of squash or indeed anybody. sport. Here are some of the benefits you can expect to enjoy:

  • Focus: Perhaps the greatest athletic benefit comes from an increased sense of focus, as distracting thoughts are left behind during the mindfulness process. This may take a few sessions to feel stronger, but trust us when we say it works.

  • Stress Relief: Taking a short break each day, allowing your mind to pause and “wander” a bit while concentrating on how you feel, has been shown to reduce stress levels. Less stress means your performance can reach its potential more successfully and hopefully break a few less racquets.

  • Positive thinking: quite related to the benefit of stress relief, through mindfulness you will naturally have a more positive outlook on situations, probably due to the fact that you have taken the time to process them and calm your body. A positive approach is crucial to success on the squash court.

  • Body Awareness: Sometimes the little aches and pains can become so familiar that we almost forget they’re there, but if you have them, they are undoubtedly hampering your squash performance. Through mindfulness you learn to “scan” your body and notice everything you feel, just make sure you deal with the nagging pains.

  • Post-match mental relaxation: Mindfulness could also be used as a post-match relaxation technique, to help process what happened and reflect on your performance, while giving your body time to pause for a few minutes .

Sounds great! Where do I start?

One great thing about mindfulness is that you don’t really need any equipment or anything to get started, just you, yourself, and a quiet space. To get used to the basics, sit in a comfortable place in a quiet and undisturbed place, close your eyes, breathe slowly and deeply, and imagine scanning your body inside from head to toe. Really see how each part of your body feels and allow any sound to be what it is. Take 10 minutes for this at first and try every day for 1 week. Then see how you feel and see if you feel a difference in the rest of your daily life, as well as on the squash court.

We also highly recommend getting your hands on an app called “Headspace”. Headspace is a great app that explains the mindfulness process in a simple way with daily reminders and topics to focus on. There is a lot of free content in addition to premium content that is worth the money if you enjoy free stuff. They have included a program focused on improving athletic performance that we highly recommend.

Lifestyle Fashion

Can you eat chicken eggs straight from the chicken coop?

Can you eat chicken eggs straight from the chicken coop? Absolutely. Fresh eggs from backyard chicken flocks are typically more nutrient dense and disease free than factory farm eggs sold in most grocery stores today. In fact, fresh eggs from backyard chicken flocks can even be eaten raw or used while still warm by the hen.

To eat your chicken eggs straight from the chicken coop:

  • Make sure your chickens are healthy and disease free; fortunately this is typical of backyard flocks. Chickens with salmonella have a notoriously unhealthy appearance and are generally only found in large factory farm operations.
  • Wash eggs before use, but not necessarily before refrigerating or storing them, as washing them removes a protective film that keeps them fresh longer.
  • Provide your chickens with a clean area to nest. Spread fresh straw or cedar chips in their nest boxes weekly to keep the eggs clean after laying.
  • Collect the eggs daily and store them in a cool place.
  • Refrigerate the eggs after washing.

The next time someone asks you if you can eat chicken eggs straight from the chicken coop, you will know what to say: Yes, of course. Ironically, chicken eggs from small backyard flocks are not only richer in nutrients and far less prone to disease, but also have better proportions of good cholesterol.

Eating farm-fresh eggs is good for your health, and cooking them so that the yolk is still runny (or adding them fresh and whole to yogurt shakes) is the best way to assimilate their nutritional benefits. Raw eggs are not a health hazard if they are fresh and the shells have been washed (use water mixed with vinegar) and dried before use, just as a precaution.

Free-range eggs are also tastier than caged eggs. The taste is good and buttery, really not even comparable to store bought eggs. Backyard chickens that have access to grass and insects in the garden produce eggs with yolks that are darker and brighter in color, almost orange, compared to the pale yellow of confined birds. These differences are evident for families who bought conventional eggs and raised their own chickens.

Once you are comfortable with the health of your chicken flock, try adding raw egg yolks to healthy shakes and shakes for added nutrition. The amazing nutritional benefits of egg yolks are best assimilated raw or near raw. In addition to raw yogurt smoothies, try coconut oil fried eggs, easier or sunny side up, and then eat them plain or toasted. This is almost like eating eggs straight from the chicken coop: delicious and good for your health.

Lifestyle Fashion

Why Stuffed Animals Are Important Gifts

Some of us may think that stuffed animals are a thing of the past, as they no longer appear to be the “it” toy. You can often decide not to give a stuffed animal as a gift and instead get something more practical, because after all, what’s the point of a stuffed toy? What reason is there to get a stuffed animal?

The answer to that is: a lot. Stuffed animals can be very significant and symbolize important events or people. This is truly a timeless gift, and we must all remember it! Let’s see why stuffed toys are important in the lives of three age groups in particular: children, adolescents, and adults.

Symbols for children

There are not too many toys for children. Kids love collecting stuffed animals of all kinds and could always use more. What could better symbolize the innocence of childhood than an adorable soft toy animal? In our own childhood, we probably spent many nights cuddling with our favorite stuffed bear or bunny. Kids enjoy the comfort of a stuffed animal, and that comfort makes a great nightmare repellent! In fact, those who say that stuffed toys are no longer in “it” toy, have not paid attention to what is happening in the world of little girls. Stuffed animals are perfectly “in” for girls. Many girls will get a natural looking stuffed cat or stuffed dog, just to be able to carry it in their little bags while emulating the graceful women who carry their little pets. Stuffed animals have certainly not gone out of style!

Teen symbols

Teens may no longer play with toys, but stuffed animals are not just toys. They are a confidant and a comfort. In fact, many teens have more stuffed animals now than when they were young. This is because stuffed animals often symbolize love or infatuation. They are memories. For example, a teenage girl will really appreciate that little stuffed dolphin that her boyfriend gave her because she knows that dolphins are her favorite animals. Or maybe your father gives you a teddy bear while on your way to college, so that you are never alone.

But it’s not just girls who can appreciate stuffed animals. Teens can enjoy them a lot too. Children often keep them as a reminder of something they did that was brave or impressive. For example, maybe they love being around that stuffed tiger they received after winning a sports game. Or maybe they have a huge stuffed lion that they won on a boardwalk after showing off their prowess at a game of darts or at a baseball stand. For them, stuffed animals are a symbol of achievement and pride.

Symbols for adults

Finally, stuffed animals can also be enjoyed by adults, although for reasons other than those enjoyed by children and adolescents. Most adults use stuffed animals as a decorative element. They will look for graceful looking natural stuffed figures or stuffed animals that can add little touches to your home or vacation home. For example, a dolphin plush at your ocean vacation home, or a tiger to make your home more exotic and fit in with the jungle theme. Hallways and entrances can be adorned with stuffed lions, black bears, or even stuffed dogs as decorations for a unique touch. Part of this is also that adult stuffed animals are more of a collectible than a toy. Many adults are true collectors, who have large collections to capture that nostalgic feeling of childhood. In fact, it’s not uncommon to find that someone you know has had a teddy bear for 20 years because of the meanings it has.

So, as you can see, stuffed animals will never go out of style for any age group. They continue to symbolize and carry meanings of all kinds. Never discount the importance of stuffed animals!

Lifestyle Fashion

Birth control pills: not everything you’ve heard is true

It seems that the same old wives’ tales of birth control pills are still popular today. These myths have been passed down from generation to generation and apparently nothing can remove them from the public consciousness. And while some may carry a grain of truth, most of them have been completely disproportionate over the years.

One of the reasons young women still refuse to take birth control pills is because they fear gaining weight. They may also be afraid of having horrible acne, growing facial hair, or enlarging their hips and breasts. None of these fears could be further from the truth. What the pill does is regulate estrogen, which can initially cause some water retention and bloating (much like the symptoms of a menstrual cycle). Changing the dose or waiting for the body to regulate itself, which may take a few months, usually fixes the problem. The pill is generally known to decrease acne, or it may not produce any noticeable change, but it would be unusual for it to suddenly cause it. It also does not produce facial hair or increase the size of the breasts and hips, although these areas may swell slightly.

So why do so many women insist that they have experienced some of these side effects? The likely answer is an inexact cause and relationship. Your body’s hormones are changing, which can temporarily alter your mood. This alone can lead to increased appetite or additional stress, which can lead to weight gain or acne. Another reason could be that they start taking the pill at a young age when the body has not fully stopped developing, meaning larger breasts and wider hips. Our bodies constantly change in small ways throughout our lives, but by changing medications, some people become acutely aware of small differences.

Has anyone ever warned you that taking birth control pills can cause cancer? It seems that almost everything today has the potential to kill you or cause some devastating disease, and again, the problem usually stems from the wrong cause and effect. Do women who take birth control get cancer? Yes. Is it because of the pill? No. In fact, studies show just the opposite. It is estimated that by taking the pill regularly, women are 1/3 less likely to develop uterine or ovarian cancer. There has also been no conclusive evidence linking the pill to increased breast cancer rates. Also, the use of the pill is highly unlikely to cause defects in babies once you are ready to conceive, as long as you stop taking them in advance.

Not all truths about birth control are so optimistic. There are possible side effects that commonly include nausea, headaches, mood swings, sore breasts, and spotting. Many of these can be controlled by changing the product and dosage, or by waiting a few months for the body to adjust. In some rare cases, more serious complications are possible, so it is important to consult with a doctor before beginning.

Lifestyle Fashion

Illuminati card game

Below is a variety of different Illuminati card games that are in print.

Illuminati: Deluxe

Illuminati Deluxe is the classic card game presented by Steve Jackson. The objective of the game is to take over the world by controlling Illuminati societies such as, among others: The Bavarian Illuminati, The Discordian Society, The UFOs, The Servants of Cthulu, The Bermuda Triangle, The Assassin Society, The Net and The Gnomes from Zurich; Please note that some societies will only be available by purchasing separate expansion packs or standalone games.

As for the gameplay, in Illuminati Deluxe players will trade, form alliances and stab each other to gain control of a world represented by a group of cards such as: Secret Masters of Fandom, CIA, International Communist, etc. To win, players must complete the objective of the game; for example, build a power structure consisting of a given number of cards, or control on one card from each alignment; however, there are many other ways to win.

Illuminati: Crime Lords

Illuminati: Crime Lords is a standalone expansion presented by Steve Jackson; In it, rival mobs compete with each other for control of the ruined city. At the beginning, you will control some gangsters; However, with ambition you can conquer the whole world.

To do this, take control of brothels, junkyards, and organized crime schemes for income. But don’t let the feds or the police stop you. The game supports a total of 2-8 players who compete directly with each other to take control of the world.

As for the rules, there are none – players can cheat, steal, and do whatever it takes to win the game. You think you have what it takes? Form alliances, break them and win.

Illuminati: mutual distraction assured

Illuminati: Mutual Assured Distraction is an expansion pack presented by Steve Jackson. In this version, you are given a set of cards to help you, once again, take control of the world.

With this card game, you will have new tactics at your disposal; for example, using the media to spread headlines that read about healthcare and a collapsed financial system to control a docile population with fear.

Additionally, this playset introduces “New World Cards” to your collection, which means your cards will now affect all players, not just the one who left them.

Illuminati: Bavarian fire drill

Illuminati: Bavarian Fire Drill is an expansion pack presented by Steve Jackson; In it, your goal is to conquer the world using a variety of new cards that players have never seen before.

To win, players must control new groups such as bloggers, reality shows, and smart design. Be careful with the purpose; Players will have new opponents to watch out for, like Bird Flu and Bigheads.

The expansion pack introduces a new type of card: artifacts. Some of which are magical, granting their owners new abilities, while others are just technological. Either way, though, players will have new powers that they can use to take over the world. With cards like Hitler’s Brain, Longinus’s Spear, and Screaming Meme, players can cheat, steal, and do whatever they can.

Lifestyle Fashion

Bored with breakfast, but need to keep it cheap?

If you’re like me, then eating eggs and toast over and over or maybe a bowl of cereal and yogurt isn’t enough. Breakfast can be boring if you have the same, so having a collection of recipes or ideas is priceless.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and the following meals will keep you energized throughout the day. These meals will also fill you up and help your wallet feel full.

Omelettes: they are much better than regular scrambled eggs. I usually only scramble 2-6 eggs, depending on how many I’m feeding, then add whatever I have, onion, ham, chicken, bacon, tomato, bell pepper, cheese, sausage, and I’ll even use leftover veggies like broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower.

Rice and Oatmeal – Not many people use rice for breakfast, but it can be used just like oatmeal. Add some milk, cinnamon, nutmeg, or diced fruit and rice or oatmeal can be a delicious and filling meal.

Waffles, pancakes, or French toast – Add this to some fruit and it makes a tasty breakfast. The most special thing about these is that you can cook and freeze them. When you’re ready to eat them, toss them in the toaster, prep the fruit, and in less than a minute you can be eating.

Smoothies or Smoothies: Who doesn’t like a tasty breakfast smoothie. For a really quick smoothie, just pour a can of fruit and a couple of ice cubes into a blender and blend until done. You can also use real yogurt and fruit for a smoothie more like breakfast.

Burrito – My all-time favorite breakfast meal. Usually my husband and I put eggs, sausage, bacon, fries, cheese, and a little green chilies. However, we will add other things that we might need to get rid of, like beans and veggies.

Lifestyle Fashion

The real house of detention (an allegory)

Can you take life? Can you give life? If you can answer both questions, “yes”, you are God, Christ, and all prophets and enlightened clairvoyant seers combined!

On those two questions, I can honestly say “don’t cheat”. With that, I begin this article. Who wouldn’t love to be consciously more than they are and have the power to do more than they can even take and give life at will or better than Darth Plagueis the Wise / Hego Damask the Sith Lord in “Star Wars”?

In fact, and sadly, we have to settle for self-control that is still underneath that kind of power, like God creating dirt from scratch with only nature on his side, as opposed to the scientist who needs all kinds of “stuff” , complicated machines and processes to create dirt from “nothing”. Yes, the real house of detention that we all face are the very concepts of limitation, weakness and dependency: as the politician in power depending on the support of the people to maintain power, make laws and do “everything”, that is a point. flagrant. of what I essentially mean by authentic weakness, dependency and limitations or commitment.

So, here’s the allegorical part of this article now: A politician has a near-death experience. That politician meets the creator they believe in. The creator or God / Deity / Source gives them the option of going to heaven or hell. First the politician sees the sky, people sitting in the clouds bored, strumming the harp strings for eternity without having to eat, drink or do anything “interesting.” It is “just heaven”. Then the politician goes to hell and finds it “better than Earth”, like the immoral party he never had with “good sex”, wild party arrangements, thrills, and “wonderful and exciting immoral things” like drugs that you they settle without the other. consequences of them. Things an immoral person would like anyway. So since he gets the whole “party” in hell instead of boredom and eternal, peaceful life and the strumming of the harp in heaven. That politician says and means “send me to hell for eternity, that’s true paradise!” and even files documents on that near-death experience with the devil to go there. So the politician really dies, and there is nothing but emptiness. Neither fire nor brimstone. Just empty and absolutely nothing. “God says, I can’t help you, you signed the papers and yourself to the devil. The devil says,” that whole fascinating and exciting scene was the campaign, and this nothing is the real and genuine office you signed for. Read the contract! “Too late and that’s how it works. Look at the reality, the technicality, and all that counts for details.

Lifestyle Fashion

Deer Valley Homes for Sale

If you are looking to buy real estate in a ski resort area, then you should consider Deer Valley in Park City Utah, which offers a great selection of ski properties for sale.. You can find for sale at Deer Valley Resort ski in ski houses, townhomes, condos, and vacant lots. There are some great new projects offering new luxury ski properties in some of the best locations on the mountain.

Deer Valley Resort is one of the best ski resorts in the country and was qualified # 1 ski resort by Ski Magazine in 2005. Deer Valley is an exclusive ski resort offering high-end service for the discerning skier looking for a fabulous ski experience. It is also one of the easiest ski areas to access with Salt Lake International Airport what offers many nonstop flights more than 100 destinations within 35 minutes by car.

Currently under construction at Deer Valley Resort is the Deer Crest St. Regis Resort and Residences scheduled for completion in August 2008. The St. Regis will offer an opulent 5-star experience in one of the best ski resorts. St. Regis is currently offering full ownership opportunities for sale at its new Deer Valley location that a local Park City Realtor can help you purchase. The St. Regis is located in the exclusive gated community of Deer Crest, offering luxury ski slopes for sale and vacant ski slopes lots to build your dream ski home. There is an amazing Deer Crest area ski estate on the market in 2006 called the Deerfield Estate, which is priced at nearly $ 26 million and offers its own private gondola.

At the base of Deer Valley Resort you will find the Lower Deer Valley area which is the first area to be developed in Deer Valley in the early 80’s. You can find older and newer construction in this area of ​​the complex. One of the popular properties for investors has been Lodges at Deer Valley, which offers excellent rental income due to its meeting room space and amenities. Lower Deer Valley condos typically start at $ 600,000 and go up to 4 million for a ski condo at Black Diamond Lodge. The average price of a single-family home is 2.4 million and the average vacant lot is 1.1 million. You will find your best value in this area of ​​Deer Valley.

In the mid-mountain area of ​​Deer Valley you will find the Silver Lake / Upper Deer Valley Area. The great benefit of this area is Silver Lake Village, which offers several great full service restaurants and many wonderful shops. So if you are looking for a village area that offers restaurants and shops within a short walk, this location can be very attractive. Condos here start at around $ 895,000 and the 2006 median price is 1.8 million. There are also fractional ownership opportunities for condos in the Upper Deer Valley area starting at $ 125,000 for a 2 bedroom ski condo. The median price for a single-family home is approximately $ 7 million, and the median lot price for the few available lots is $ 1.6 million.

In the upper mountainous area of ​​Deer Valley is the newer area of ​​the mountain called Empire Pass area. It is also one of the most beautiful areas of the mountain offering some of the most spectacular views. Here are some great new condo projects for skiing on the newly completed or under construction ski slopes in this popular area of ​​Deer Valley Resort. There are also some luxury townhomes, single family homes, and vacant lots. Condos in this area of ​​Deer Valley start at 1.6 million with a 2006 median price of 2.6 million. The median price of a single family home is 5.4 million and there are currently no vacant lots available, but the amazing Red Cloud area of ​​the Empire Pass area will launch some incredible lots in 2007. Property Owners in the Empire area Pass belong to a unique ski club that offers incredible amenities for owners both on the mountain and in a local private golf community.

Deer Valley is an amazing ski area that you should seriously consider if you are looking to buy ski resort real estate. It offers a great selection of properties for skiing on the ski slopes that is difficult to find in many other ski resort communities. Most of the other ski areas have been built long ago in the most attractive places on the mountain. At Deer Valley you will find a better selection of new construction in the most desirable areas of the mountain. Deer Valley is in one of the easiest ski towns to get to, with a major international airport just a short drive away. So give Deer Valley your strong consideration.

Lifestyle Fashion

My boyfriend wants space, should I give it to him?

Of all the things your boyfriend can say during the course of your relationship, “I need some space” is the most confusing. Your stomach sinks. Suddenly you feel nauseous. A thousand things go through your mind and none of them are good.

Did I do something wrong? Will you break up with me?

Did you find someone else?

Thoughts like these spin in your head, gaining speed and momentum until everything is out of control. You cannot think clearly in a situation like this. Especially since you don’t know exactly what your boyfriend wants, or why he said what he did.

Having your boyfriend want space is never a good thing. The brutal truth is that yes, he could be thinking about ending the relationship. You are in a place where you are not 100% satisfied with the way things are right now.

Now note: I didn’t say I wasn’t happy. Your boyfriend could still be happy and ask for space, and this situation can be even more disastrous. What if your relationship is going well and there were no warning signs? Chances are your boyfriend is trying to use the “space” theme as an excuse to chase or even date another girl.

The good thing about him wanting space

Okay, so you want space. It’s not all bad news, and here’s why:

If your boyfriend wants to end the relationship, all he has to do is break up with you. You’d hear things like “this isn’t working” or “we’re not compatible” or the always amazing “it’s not you, it’s me”. These things are phrases to end a relationship, which means that your boyfriend seeks to be single at the end of the conversation.

But your boy said he needed space. Or ‘room to breathe’. Or ‘time to think’. Maybe he said ‘we are moving too fast’. Each and every one of those sayings is type code for this:

“Go away for a while, but please don’t go too far … in case I decide that I love you again.”

This is a double edged sword. It’s bad because your boyfriend is trying to convince you to accept a trial breakup. He wants the freedom to play the field and see other people, but he wants the safety and comfort of knowing that you will still be waiting for him.

In other words, he’s being a selfish jerk.

However, the good news is that your boyfriend doesn’t want to completely lose you. By playing the ‘space’ card, you are trying to put it in a waiting pattern. STILL wants to see you (although maybe not right away). STILL wants you to be available to talk, text, or even meet. Most of all, your boyfriend wants you in his field of vision. He wants to be able to see you, and everything you are doing, so that he can continue to trust that these Do not use this trial separation as a vehicle to go out with other guys and possibly end up leaving you for someone else.

The downside of giving your boyfriend space

Okay, so you know he still has feelings for you. It’s fine. But there are many negatives to agreeing to give your boyfriend space when he asks for it, and you need to understand what they are.

First of all, giving him space is like giving him a license to sleep with other people. Even if they got back together after such an event, her boyfriend would always say that infidelity meant nothing because “they weren’t really together.” You know that’s false, and of course he knows it too. But sadly, this is what it will do.

The other thing about accepting your ‘I need room to breathe’ excuse is that the balance of power shifts 100% in your favor. Suddenly, you have no control over anything, because you are giving it space. You get to be in the driver’s seat, because you decide when (and if) the ‘I need space’ thing ends.

During this temporary break, your guy will keep a strict eye on you. He wants you on a leash. And because he’s the one who claimed to have needed space, the worst part is that their relationship now turns one-sided. If he calls you, he’s just cool and talkative. But if you call him? Suddenly you are suffocating him. He may act irritated with you, because you are not giving him “his space”, which makes you feel that, somehow, you are the culprit.

What should I do if my boyfriend wants space?

Well, to the good. This is what you do, and what you say to him, when your boyfriend pulls the ‘leave me alone for a while’ card:

First of all, you must stay strong. The second worst thing you can do is cry or get angry, and the worse What you can do is beg or plead with him not to do this. Breaking down emotionally like that, you better give him all control. From there, everything that happens in your relationship is his decision, not yours.

Second, you CANNOT agree to their terms. Do you want space? Too. You don’t “make” space. Either he goes out with you or not, those are his decisions, because you respect the relationship too much and you respect YOURSELF too much, to relax and wait for someone who may or may not return.

When your boyfriend tells you that he wants to spend some time apart to think about things (or whatever he says), you say this:

“” Yes, sorry, no. I don’t do the whole “give me space” thing. If you really feel that way, let’s break up. Obviously, you have some problems and I’m not in limbo while you solve them. “

This is how you go from a bad situation to a better one. Either your ex will start to walk away, retracting the whole idea, or they will cheat on you about the breakup. If it does the latter, you have to stand your ground. You have to be able to walk away from the conversation, leave him completely alone, and disconnect for a while. Don’t answer his phone, don’t go online to check emails or Facebook … let him understand that his plan just failed. Let him realize that if he really wants to continue this “I think we need a break” nonsense, he will real chance of losing you forever.