As if dating wasn’t confusing enough, these days it’s not uncommon for contact to continue even after the relationship ends. Facebook, MySpace, emails, and now text messages … all of these things are ways for your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend to stay in touch with you long after you’ve gone your separate ways.

But exactly why Does your ex still text you? Are alone? Just being friendly? Or are they getting closer for a more specific reason, like possibly wanting you to come back?

Reasons an ex will text you after breakup

If you were on the receiving end of an unwanted breakout, it’s hard to know how to interpret these mixed signals. At this point, you are looking for signs that your ex might want you back, but at the same time you are also trying to be realistic. That being said, an ex who still texts you after breaking things down is definitely I haven’t finished seeing you yet.

Now this doesn’t necessarily mean that your ex boyfriend or girlfriend wants to get back together right now. However, the interest they show is certainly more than friendly contact. There is no such thing as having an innocent little chat, not after dating someone and sharing such an intimate connection. Chances are your ex still has unresolved feelings and emotions towards you, and doesn’t know exactly how to handle them right now.

Think of it this way: If your ex had totally and completely broken up with you, they wouldn’t be talking to you at all. There would be no calls, emails, or texts from your ex … this type of contact would drastically decrease the moment your ex made the decision to move on without you.

So what does your ex want? Why are they texting even after the romance ends?

Simply put, your ex boyfriend or girlfriend is I’m still thinking about you. Even though you are no longer dating, your ex has not given up on having you in his life. They would like to keep you close, but they cannot do it directly. So they make the next best thing: they send you random text messages and scattered phone calls designed to keep you close at hand.

You see, your ex doesn’t want you to come back. At least not now, anyway. Instead, your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is trying to keep an eye on you as they get a taste of their new single life. Knowing that you are still on the other end of the phone, even through something as impersonal as texting, gives your ex the confidence and security of knowing that they can always back off if necessary. This allows your ex to move on and possibly meet someone else.

Reply to text messages from your ex boyfriend or girlfriend

Responding to your ex’s text messages right now is a big mistake. Go back and forth with them right now, and you will do nothing but play the game. Instantly responding to that contact lets your ex know that they can probably get you back whenever they want. objective no Reply to these texts and completely ignore your ex boyfriend or girlfriend? This will go a long way toward getting you wanted back.

An ex who doesn’t know where you are or what you’re doing will get very curious very quickly. Ignore them and your ex’s text messages feel the same rejection that you are going through right now. They will start to worry that maybe you’ve moved on, or maybe you’ve already gotten over the relationship. By not playing this little texting volleyball game, you are ensuring maximum future interest from your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend.

If you’re wondering why my ex still texts me, it’s probably because you want them back. Maybe you’ve already taken steps to reverse your breakup or are trying to get your ex to change his mind. However, in reality, just texting you betrays your ex boyfriend or girlfriend’s current level of interest. As innocent as that contact may seem (or as innocent as they pretend it to be), your ex keeps this line of communication open for a specific reason: to monitor your progress without them.

Do you want your boyfriend or girlfriend back? Don’t leave that important goal to chance. Don’t play games or fall into your ex’s friendship trap. Instead, work to learn to doand what is more important, exactly when you should be taking action.