The famous psychologist, Dr. George Crane, said: “Words of thanks are the most powerful force for goodwill on earth.”

Psychologists want you to know that sincere praise, appreciation, which is a form of love, means just as much to people as food, work, and the other essentials of a normal, happy life. So here is one of your most important opportunities to gain the goodwill that is necessary for a successful career, marriage, and friendships, as well as the satisfaction that comes from being useful.

Do you have a rich, well-chosen treasure trove of companion words to tap into? Because the success of your compliments is limited by your vocabulary. If the only verbal bouquets you can give are “good” and “great,” you’re not doing an effective job of generating goodwill for yourself or satisfaction for others.

Everyone craves special recognition. That’s why a written note is more appreciated than a printed greeting card. So instead of offering stereotypical compliments that sound like dime greeting cards, bestow some of the specific and highly valued adjectives you’ll find in the next three chapters. They will show that you are grateful, that you have been moved to choose the special word for the particular person.

Psychologists and ministers tell us about the power of positive words to win friends and succeed. So isn’t it logical that a vocabulary of expressive words of appreciation is of paramount importance? Our language has many more words to describe the bad traits than to describe the good ones. So the best words of praise are actually verbal gems. This is your chance to own many of these “hit words” and, in the words of an old folk song, “Accentuate the Positive.”

THE SECRET OF FINDING SOMETHING TO PULL IN PEOPLE

Will Rogers, America’s beloved simple wise man, said, “I never met a man I didn’t like.” What Rogers meant, of course, was that he found some admirable quality in every man he met.

We can find something to congratulate everyone on if we adopt Will Rogers’ positive and caring attitude toward people. So he develops the habit of looking for the good points, not the bad ones. You will find what you are looking for.

You’ll develop your ability to compliment faster if you try to appreciate and praise everyone, regardless of whether they can “do you any good.” The fact is that every compliment you give does you good, even if it only helps you develop an attitude and a skill.

ask yourself; What is commendable in the other person, in his abilities, character, personality and appearance? Watch it carefully. Draw it about his job, his family, his home, and his hobbies.

Don’t overlook a person’s lesser attributes. A successful executive can get bored with the constant praise he receives for his business savvy. However, he can glow with pride when someone compliments his amateur photography prowess or his elegant appearance.

You don’t always have to find a direct compliment to give a person. When you say a nice word to someone about their family, their home, or their hobby, you are indirectly congratulating them. Of course, the easiest way to show your admiration for a person is to ask their opinion. You can ask for her opinion on something related to her work (but not free advice), her hobby, the news, movies, books, etc.

THE POWER OF POSITIVE WORDS IN CONVERSATION

If you have faithfully studied these first three chapters, you will soon notice a marked improvement in your ability to get along with people, win friends and goodwill. I mentioned earlier that the famous psychologist, Dr. George Crane, stated, “Words of appreciation are the most powerful force for goodwill on earth.” He now possesses a vocabulary of some of the most powerful thank you words in the English language.

But you will notice that you have improved not only your human relations vocabulary, but also your personality. Your philosophy of life has become more constructive. This is because you are absorbing, and hopefully using, the power of positive words. From now on, make a special effort to add such words to your vocabulary.

You can use this great power of positive words in other ways besides giving compliments. Use it to keep your conversation light-hearted. Avoid talking about failed deals, illnesses and accidents. Talk about the constructive, optimistic and positive side of life.

What is this power of positive words in conversation? It’s just that people instinctively seek the pleasant, avoid the unpleasant. They already have enough problems of their own. When they talk to you, they are looking for an “elevator”. That is why the happy and grateful person is more popular and successful than the one who is always trying to sell us sadness and pessimism, the two things we are never on the market for! This applies to both business and social conversations.

Every time you speak, remember that you are painting a picture of yourself. Make sure the title is not “Bad Luck,” “Gloom,” or “Illness.” Would you like a painting like this in your office or at home?