One of the most challenging aspects of parenting can be taking care of your child’s interests. As your child gets older, she will begin to exhibit traits that are an indicator of what her interests are. I believe that we are all created with a purpose and our job as parents is to guide our children in the direction that will best help them become who they should be, to find their destiny.

Each child has an interest and a different way of expressing it. In my house there is a budding music producer, a born journalist, an athlete and an artist. Talk to your child or children; ask them what kinds of things interest them. I’ve found that usually by the age of 10 or 11, most kids have a general idea of ​​what they’d like to do. The easiest way to find this out is to ask a question like this: “If you could do anything in the world that you wanted to do that wasn’t cruel or illegal, and you got paid to do it and it would be fun.” …what would you do?” By the middle school years, your child has an idea of ​​what he or she really likes. Find out what this activity or interest is and find activities in your area that you can use to develop this interest.

There are many things that can be bought at thrift stores or obtained for free. My 13-year-old son wants to be an animator. I was able to find an older version of Adobe Flash for him off of Craigslist, for free. There’s no need to spend $600 for the latest version of software when a little searching can yield cheaper results. I also found a weight bench at the thrift store for under $30.00 for my 18 year old son when he was weight training for football. For my budding music producer, I found an old keyboard that someone was about to throw away and ordered it. All it needed were batteries. Now children themselves have learned how to be resourceful and look for articles that can be easily downloaded or viewed on the Internet at no cost.

I know it can be quite hectic going from dance classes to art, to minor league and football practices, music lessons, etc., so some strategic planning is necessary if you have multiple children, especially if you are single. relative. Find other parents in the area whose children are attending the same activities and share the load.

Most importantly, you have to be interested and supportive. You can’t decide for your child what his gift or talent is. You can’t push them into what you want their gift to be, or minimize what they want to do. There is nothing more frustrating than throwing your frustrated desires and achievements at your child. I know there are a lot of men (and women too) who really like sports, but just because you have a son or daughter who may have a great athletic build, you can’t force athleticism on your child. He or she may not want to do that. Don’t put your frustration at not achieving what you would have wanted on the sports field on your child. You may have the next business tycoon or president of the United States. It’s not about what you want them to do so you can look good and show off; it’s about what they want to do…what they were created to do. Actually, you should brag because they are your children. If your son wants to be a dancer and you play for the NFL… so what? Let me do it. he is not you. He is a product OF you but he is NOT you.

I have talked to many parents who struggle with this. Just because you have an Olympic gold medal or a Super Bowl ring doesn’t mean your child should do the same. For example, President George Bush’s daughter, Laura, loved reading books and wanted to be a school teacher. She had no desire to be a lawyer. Her parents supported her.

Our children are not necessarily going to do what we do, because they are not us. But we can influence them in a positive way, and with our support, they will be successful in everything they do. You should do this because you never want your children to feel like they are letting you down with their career choices.

A child who grows into an adult feeling dissatisfied because he pursued his dreams instead of his own will be very frustrated as an adult. A child whose dreams are crushed and discouraged will find adult life more challenging than it should be. He wanted to be a fashion designer. I was invited and visited by the representatives of a prestigious design school, but they laughed at me and put me off. They told me “Those kinds of things are for sissies.”

Let your child show you and teach you what his interest is, support him 100%. Communicate with your children and come up with a game plan early on to ensure your children’s success.