One: The two-headed coin
loads carried
“Father and Son” – Yusuf/Cat Stevens
1970 Vietnam
The wind rushing past his hood brought Finn back from his temporary dream state as he lowered himself onto the ship off the coast of North Vietnam. He couldn’t maintain consciousness and wondered if he was bleeding to death. Had Mathe’s calls brought him back?
Captain Matthew (MÄ?the) “Rock” Stone watched the descent of his friend, LT Jonathan “Finn” Finley, as he mounted his wing from a distance, helplessly watching the rapidly declining control of Finn’s plane. “Stick together, mate. We’re almost home,” Mathe yelled, watching as the jet of fuel drained from Finn’s plane, too close to his jet’s exhaust.
Finn tried to keep his head up. Holding out hope, he glanced at the gauges to reconfirm his trouble. He felt the energy being sucked out of the machine from him and himself and pressed the button on the microphone. Clinging to hope, his fingers found the appropriate buttons and knobs within the cockpit to combat his emergencies, but he knew he was succumbing fast.
“Mathe, I’m not sure I can stretch this glide to the boat,” he said, trying to sound confident.
Finn slowly rolled the scooter toward shore, thinking his chances of survival were better on land. He was well into North Vietnam and would find a way out to the safety of the South. Blood in the water from an ejection was the last thing he wanted after hearing stories of aggressive shark populations off the coast. Finn’s mind raced.
He continued to look out of the cockpit at the empty sky in front of him and felt as if he wasn’t there. Time seemed to compress as she held the stick a little tighter and alternated between accepting his fate and fighting for her life.
A vice-like fear flickered in and out of his thoughts for his chances of survival as the torso of his G-suit seemed to tighten on its own. He was slowly releasing the pressure of speed, time, altitude, distance, fuel, and system calculations—common flying worries seemed to melt away. The internal battle to give in to his emotions, to yell and leave the job to someone else, to simply run the machine, was growing stronger.
Deep in North Vietnamese airspace, in a badly damaged fighter, Lieutenant Johnathan “Finn” Finley thought to himself: Don’t take the easy road-wwork to survive your wounds. You have support, the ship is waiting for you, and Taco and Mathe are on your wing, you will make it. Then there was the other voice, but then…
The engine fire warning light suddenly flashed intermittently and then shone brightly on the instrument panel of Finn’s A-4 Skyhawk, saying it all.
“My God! Fire! God no! Not today, not now, please!” Finn yelled.
He thought he heard the crackle of hot metal coming from the rear of the plane and felt the heat rise. A small wisp of smoke rose from the floor of the cabin and the jet jumped. She was suddenly watching the dirt and everything else on the cabin floor rise up to eye level and then suddenly fall. He only took a second.
Mathe followed Finn’s plane down on its wing, looking at him in surprise and horror, and the frustration of not being able to help her friend. He was eating him alive. Suddenly, the words of Finn’s father, spoken to both children long ago, appeared in his head:
“Guys, don’t ever let yourself be turned into a two-sided coin, you’ll never win! You’ve probably never seen one, but they were common in my day, and they can be a big deal if the stakes are high on the coin.” You are very much alike, more than you are different in many ways. A two-sided coin can be a powerful tool in the wrong hands, so be careful about your abilities and the direction you take in life. Sometimes the wrong decision paths are easily taken.”
Finn was frozen, caught between covering every inch of ground to the safety of the sea and the aircraft carrier Raleigh (CVA-23) in its rapidly decaying machine, and the reality he didn’t want to admit: his plane firecracker might explode. anytime. Returning to his trained senses, he hit the PCL (power control lever, throttle), pushed the fuel cut-off lever to emergency stop, and pulled the emergency generator handle to extend it.
Clinging for dear life, he yelled at his plane, “I need fuel now, but fire, no, no, no.”
Finn fought for control, squeezing the stick tighter, squeezing her tighter, trying to get the attention she wasn’t paying him, to control her, to fight her if necessary. Still, he spun in a rock and roll that quickly decayed. The fog bank below was about to swallow them both, as he continued to strain and scream for control of the machine.
Finn’s vice of survival, clinging to life but fighting the chance to leave, was reaching critical mass. Throw it out before it’s too late, he told himself. Mathe’s and Taco’s voices yelled at him to get out, but he held out a little longer, closer to his carrier, or was he on shore? Confused and in and out of consciousness, he wasn’t sure anymore.
Losing consciousness for a moment, the jet suddenly abandoned flight again and began to spin with fire engulfing the cabin. Finn’s jet was now flying backwards, a real ass.
“Please, God, get your nose off the llama so I can go,” Finn cried.
The hot rod slowly begins to turn its nose toward the fog bank below.
He’s beyond caring about the no-mistakes pilot, the near-perfect pilot, in his opinion the most consistent OK three-wire grabber in the squad.
“I need to live,” he yelled, and suddenly, “God, I have no control!”
“I can’t save the plane and I’m not sure of myself,” he muttered.
Calm settled over Finn, nothing mattered much to him now. Not the pain in the nose and cheek, the heat and fire; not the safety green color of your aircraft cabin, the smell of oil, jet fuel, locker room/cabin sweat, not the dry, gummy O2 on demand you breathed. His concern about the wind whistling through the holes in the plane, below him and right next to him, didn’t seem so important now.
There was Captain Matthew (MÄ?the) Stone, his partner “Talon” and his friend, frantically waving at him as he flew past him and Taco, in the wake, yelling at him to eject.
Mathe joined in: “Finn, get out! Get out of the plane now!”
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Recent Reader Review
“This adventure is a wild ride through a difficult time in our nation’s history. Tea Author he applies his own flight experience and feelings to each of the characters he meets in this story.
You really don’t need to be an aviation lover or military buff to enjoy the adrenaline rush that comes from every page. “high air” not only puts you in the cockpit of dynamic combat flight, it also puts you into the hearts and minds of its heroes.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!”